The Minority Report - "Immortals" (2011)

“Immortals” is not the epic, “300”-level movie that people were anticipating. It will not be remembered, and will quickly fade from the memories of those who paid for this visual spectacle. This movie is essentially the film equivalent of fireworks. It is pretty to look at, the audience will “ooh” and “ah,” but it will not make you feel any emotion deeper than “man, this is pretty.” Really, this movie is like the hot blonde at the bar: full of attractive looks, but cannot carry on a conversation for longer than five seconds (no offense to blondes, you’re all lovely women). The point is that “Immortals” is not winning any awards, but is capable of holding your attention for the entire running time.

The story follows Theseus (Henry Cavill) and his exploits fighting the Hyperion army led by their king (Mickey Rourke), while the gods intervene to help prevent the release of the titans. The story has been told countless times and is cliché. The dialogue essentially boils down to primitive grunts and gestures. It is just an excuse to drive the story along to lead the audience from one stunning looking local or amazing fight scene to the next. Speaking of the fight scenes, they are over the top, ludicrously bloody, and grizzly—what else could you want!? The acting is as unimpressive as the script. Regardless, this film was entertaining.

In the end, Immortals is nothing too special. It will not change your life or make you think. But, if you are looking for a movie to just turn off your brain after a long week at work, then this movie will do the trick. It is as violent as it is gorgeous. It is like watching a beautiful painting of a shirtless man kicking ass dry.


By V-Dawg

The Minority Report - "Rise of the Planet of the Apes" (2011)

“Caesar is home.”
This movie definitely had big shoes to fill to say the least. The original “Planet of the Apes” film was absolutely superb in most every way, and a prequel claiming to give rise to the former needed to do outshine all of the previous attempts. That it did. I love the original series and was looking forward to this movie, unlike some of my counterparts. It seemingly came out of nowhere and proved that sequels (or prequels, for that matter) can be excellent movies in and of themselves.

The story begins with a scene in Africa, where the natives are capturing apes. They are getting shipped to a testing facility under the direction of a man by the name of Will Rodman (James Franco) who is in the process of developing a cure for Alzheimer’s, which he tests on the captured apes. Soon, he finds that one of the apes has immensely increased intelligence due to the ALZ-112 drug he is developing. They present the results to a board of directors and investors that wish will decide to market the product or not, but the meeting is disrupted by the intelligent ape, who is shot. It turns out she was a female and had lashed out only because she felt her baby, who she had given birth to secretly, was threatened by the researchers. This puts a damper on Will’s plan to possibly cure Alzheimer’s since his lab is left without chimps after they force the researchers to put them all down, and because he also takes the baby chimp to his home so that it won’t get killed like the others. There, he raises it to keep his father, Charles (John Lithgow), who has Alzheimer’s, company. What began as a temporary house guest soon becomes part of the family as he gains more and more intelligence along the way. Will records the progress and realizes that the ape, whom he named Caesar (Andy Serkis), has inherited the genes for intelligence from his mother. Soon, terrible circumstances force Caesar into a situation where he has to take charge and grow as an ape and as an eventual person. The future of the world is at stake.

Treading a fine line between retribution and compassion, Caesar’s character accepts the role of protagonist in an inspiringly human way. The emotions displayed by the apes and humans alike drag you in and don’t let go. You find yourself hoping and praying that the apes get their way, as the conditions for both sides get worse and worse. Will’s fight against the ravages of Alzheimer’s on his father is emotionally charged and deeply saddening. Here is a man who has dedicated his entire life to save his father, but has created something different as a result. Special praise has to be given to Weta Digital—the company which created the special effects in the film. If the apes wouldn’t have been so realistic, the drama would not have been felt the way it was. The interaction between the real world and the special effects was flawless, and the detail and craftsmanship of the apes was impressive. A film both inspiring and terrifying in its scope, it really brings home new ideas on what it is to be human. This film is only slightly like watching paint dry on redwood trees that tell the story of the rise of the apes.


By Kulguy