The Minority Report - "Black Swan" (2010)

Some will hail “Black Swan,” as a cinematic masterpiece. They will find this movie to be a profound, intelligent, suspense driven drama that will go down as a classic through the ages. While others will call it indie garbage and an excuse to watch Natalie Portman strokes her va-jay-jay for two hours. My opinion of the movie rests somewhere in the middle as it is not the greatest movie ever created and also not the worst. Coming out of the theater, all I could utter was “Eh.” I know that others will argue with me about my apathetic review of this movie and others will agree with it. I seem to have the same problem with all of Darren Aronofsky’s ("Requiem for a Dream", "The Wrestler") films. I know I will always rest on the “I do not get it” part of the audience when it comes to these types of films. A film like this, you have to approach with the pace of an over analytical art critic strolling through the Louvre, which does not make for an entertaining afternoon. Instead, it makes for one with yawns and images you cannot understand. At times, the movie shoves the fact that it has deeper meaning and practically screams that it thinks itself a visual masterpiece. This makes it at times come off as pretentious.

The film follows Nina (Natalie Portman), a ballet dancer who soon finds herself in the lead role of Swan Lake. Nina is selected because of her perfection for the white swan part of the production, but slowly loses her mind and transforms into the part she so desperately desires—the black swan. Mila Kunis ("The Book of Eli") also plays the seductive Lily, who just adds paranoia to Nina, fueling her delusions. It is a trip through the rabbit hole.

The film is average in the sense of story, is filled with unnecessary scenes, but the cinematography is top notch. Some shots are especially remarkable. The use of mirrors is equally as astonishing. The way it is filmed is unique and makes the film truly art. Yet, even art can leave one uninspired and with a sense of “eh.” The film is nothing special and I know others will argue. It is not necessarily bad, just not special. You never get the feeling of “I am watching a masterpiece.” At times I felt that my money was spent on soft core porn with a suspenseful story. It leaves a lot for the viewer to interpret. All in all, it is like watching abstract art by a famous artist with a name you cannot pronounce, and at the end of the day you still do not know the point of, dry.

By V-Dawg

The Minority Report - "(500) Days of Summer" (2009)

“This is not a love story. This is a story about love.”
(500) Days of Summer is the chick-flick for guys. It is a story about a boy who falls in love and instead of like in a chick flick, where the perspective would be from the woman, it is heavily sympathetic in the male’s direction. The movie is a daring and interesting mix of comedy and drama presented in an essential way of filming. This movie has been out for a while, earned enough praise from more esteemed sources, and been picked and overlooked for its entirety. So, to take a new fresh spin on this review and put a little of a Watching Paint Dry spice, I will talk about the movie from the average man’s perspective.

The first time I saw this tale of one man’s persistent pursuit for what he thought was the girl of his dreams, it hit home for me. It touched parts of me and went deep into my life. And as I talked about the movie with more and more of my guy friends, it seems that it connected to them too. Yet, the females I talked to about this movie seemed to deem it as a slow-paced bore fest. I can see this effect, as this movie truly puts the evil of female indecision and the dire effect of male bluntness and assumptions forward. Maybe it was this that easily swept us into this great indie feeling movie, or maybe it was the absolute, pure hotness of Zooey Deschanel that dug into the male audience. All aside, though, Zooey plays the part of a slightly strange, anti social, girl next door type perfectly. Then, Joseph Gordon-Levitt does a great job playing the loser-like boy who just wants more in life, and also has great chemistry with Deschanel (did I mention she is hot?).

This movie is one of my favorites, and for me to review it may be biased. I may have a slight crush on Zooey Deschanel, and I also am a major sucker for movies with an indie feel, but please take my word when I say this tale of boy love girl, girl doesn’t love boy is fantastic. It is a must see, and great experience. Some complaints people may find in the movie is that it moves a little slow, primarily shows the perspective of the male, and may be a little too strange for the average movie watcher, but if you are looking for an artful, mature comedy, this is your best option. This movie is nothing close to watching paint dry (and is more like watching Zooey Deschanel for two hours!).

By V-Dawg