The Minority Report - "Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" (2011)

“If I don’t kill a man every now and then, they forget who I am.”
This was probably one of those movies that was very highly anticipated, as it opened the summer box office. That it did…with a bang: $90.1 million in domestic ticket sales and $256.3 in international ticket sales at the opening box office. It’s no wonder, too, considering it boasted what many girls with eyes glazed over claim is the sexiest pirate ever—Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp). I don’t say “Captain Jack Sparrow,” since he doesn’t deserve to be called so this movie. The 4th installment in the “Pirates” series, seeks to maintain all the charm of its predecessors with a different story. It does a decent job, but obviously still suffers from the aches and pains of being a sequel.

The story revolves around the ever-eccentric Jack Sparrow, who has travelled to London to locate an impersonator that is recruiting a crew for a ship to find the Fountain of Youth. After rescuing his former crewmate, he has an encounter with the king, who offers him a spot aboard a vessel to discover the lost fountain before the Spanish. The expedition will be headed by none other than Captain Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush), who has become a privateer since losing the Black Pearl to Blackbeard (Ian McShane). Sparrow declines and escapes to unmask his impostor, who ends up being his ex, Angelica (Penélope Cruz). He ends up on Blackbeard’s ship, in a quest that will pit him against Spain, London, Mermaids, Juan Ponce de León, and Blackbeard, all leading up to the fabled Fountain of Youth.

Jack Sparrow’s quirkiness is still here in full swing, but the true acting prowess and the reason I chose the quote at the beginning is Ian McShane’s Blackbeard. He is the perfect villain. Emanating pure evil, controlling his ship with his sword, and making use of a crew of zombies, the man pulls it off no sweat. Even though the movie can get a bit hectic with the fighting sequences, it is still a fun ride for the beginning of summer. I wouldn’t give it as low a score as it has on Rotten Tomatoes currently, but it is definitely nowhere near as great as its predecessors. The 3D was also definitely not worth it, as there were probably 5 scenes that were noticeably done for the 3D effect. I watched it normally, and can safely tell everyone not to waste their money on it. This movie is like watching paint dry on the many islands and ships of the Caribbean.


By Kulguy